6 Ways To Get The Most Out Of Therapy As An Infj explores key ideas related to psychology, presented clearly and practically.
the INFJ who so often feels misunderstood,
they’re always met with one big question.
And then that’s usually followed by.. ‘Will
I even be able to accurately explain how I’m
feeling?’ Wel.. today we’re going to make both
of those questions a little easier to answer.
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Number 1: Find a therapist that “Just Gets It”
The first and most crucial aspect of therapy is
the one that makes the entire thought of following
through with therapy, extremely daunting. For the
INFJ who avoids small talk like the plague and
would much prefer to hear how another person is
doing rather than explain their own difficulties,
searching for the right therapist is a lot more
difficult and uncomfortable than people would
imagine. There’s two things every INFJ must keep
in mind on their hunt for a like-minded therapist
and those things are, 1. They really are out there
somewhere and 2. Some therapists deserve second
and third chances. As an introvert who is known
for having fewer close friendships because of the
value they place on depth rather than surface
level connections, INFJs will certainly become
bored of a therapist that has no desire to
find the deeper meanings behind their emotions
they can actually help rather than just someone
to vent to, which is a characteristic they can
the INFJ, it’s way more important to feel
a connection with a therapist than it is for
them to have all the degrees in the world.
Above all, intuition is the ultimate deal
trust and connection isn’t there, there’s no
going around that for this personality type.
Once an INFJ finally feels comfortable enough to
voluntarily sit with this new stranger, it’s time
to be realistic about what this connection is
meant for. For the INFJ who is so familiar with
being the advocate for other people, it’s quite
odd and even unbearable at times to sit on the
other side of things and actually receive guidance
from someone else. For the first few times during
a therapy session, INFJs should remind themselves
that there’s no better time than to try and put
into words how they’re feeling. It’s good to keep
in mind that nobody is rushing them to open up
but there’s also no need to hesitate. This
difficulty with expressing emotions is rooted
in the INFJ’s tendency to feel things on a very
deep level. Most people with this personality
type would consider themselves empaths or highly
sensitive people, and accepting this aspect of
themselves is a crucial aspect of gaining the
most out of therapy. Once the INFJ finds a safe
and patient place where they know they won’t be
judged, they may even surprise themselves with
the built-up emotions and tension they are
able to release.. Sometimes without warning!
Number 3: Write out certain topics to be discussed
Speaking of having difficulty expressing their
emotions, wants and needs in life - one of the
best things an INFJ can do before a therapy
session is sit with a pen and paper. Most INFJs
are in face-to-face conversations. Whether it be
that they’re too distracted observing the other
person during a verbal conversation or they just
can’t find the right words to express what they’re
feeling accurately, if an INFJ has the option to
take the written way out, they’ll find it much
easier. INFJs have intricate inner worlds, and
they can process their feelings for hours, days,
and beyond before even thinking about saying them
out loud to another person. These mentally-active
times are the perfect opportunities for an INFJ to
empty their thoughts onto paper in order for both
themselves and their therapist to see what’s
going behind the many facets of their mind.
By arriving at a therapy session (especially
with a new therapist) prepared with notes, goals,
talking points, and realizations, INFJs will
naturally feel much more at ease and comfortable.
self-criticisms or an overachieving mindset, so
just leave them at home. With the natural tendency
for perfectionism-rooted self-sabotage, therapy
may be used as means of perfecting their mental
health to the standard they believe they should be
at. And.. this approach to self-healing defeats a
lot of the original purpose behind it. Instead of
using therapy as a tool to better themselves,
the INFJ may use it as a tool to become their
ideal selves, and those 2 approaches are very
different and have very different outcomes.
In fact, unrealistic goal-setting is a perfect
place to start when speaking to a therapist of
habits that may be detrimental to overall mental
well-being. When talking to a therapist about
personal realistic goals, a great thing to keep in
mind is to avoid thinking of therapy as a cure or
a magic solution.For example, instead of saying “I
would like to get rid of my anxiety completely,”
which probably just isn’t possible, it’s better
to say “ I would like to find ways to cope with
and minimize my anxiety.” Of course, the INFJ’s
logical thinking process knows this to be true,
but talking about expectations in a realistic
manner sets them up for true attainable success.
Number 5: Ask for honest and direct feedback
the therapist is doing the exact same thing.
Without extroverted feeling at hand, most
therapists have to decipher how to effectively
communicate with their patient the hard way.
They’re testing their limits of how honest,
upfront, critical, logical and emotional they
sometimes it doesn't hurt to help them out a
little. Ironically, the INFJ’s ability to read
between the lines allows them to gain the sense of
direction their therapist may be going in before
they even get there. In fact, not only are INFJs
able to do this, but they’re naturally wired to
try and gauge where conversations, connections and
thought patterns are headed. However, other times,
an INFJ may have false leads, directing them to
a sense of hostility that isn’t actually there.
Because most therapists are trained to keep their
emotional biases out of their therapy approach,
it’s not as easy to read them as some INFJs
may think. This is when an INFJ’s observant
nature works in the opposite way they hoped it
would. And so..there's nothing better for an INFJ
than to just let a new therapist know that they
are more than capable of handling truths and that
they actually prefer a more honest and direct
approach. Remember therapists are only human,
and it’s okay to ask if you are unsure about
what they are trying to say or hint to you.
Number 6: Accept that therapy is a journey
Like everything in life, it’s not about the
destination but the adventure it takes to get
there. And sometimes, there’s no destination
and it wouldn’t be logical to think otherwise.
For the INFJ who may even silently compare their
mental health and healing progress with those
around them, it’s a good reminder to know that
therapy is not only a journey but progress looks
entirely different from one person to the next.
Therapy and mental healing is never linear,
and it’s certainly not something that should
be compared amongst friends or family. Instead,
taking the leap to mental or emotional counseling
any guilt attached to not attending therapy as
often or attending more often than in the past.
And there shouldn’t be any guilt in going back
to therapy after you’ve hit your ‘end-date-goal’
Well PSYCH-Os, that’s it for today’s video..
So, have you seeked out therapy as an INFJ?
And if so, how much has it helped you? Let us know
in the comments below! Also, make sure to leave us
a like, share with your friends and also subscribe
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