Parenting Mistakes That Destroy An Infj’S Childhood explores key ideas related to psychology, presented clearly and practically.
Bright, intuitive and private, the INFJ child
is one who can certainly challenge a parent’s
thinking and expectations when it comes to
Holding themselves to a very high standard
since early childhood, there are certain mistakes
that can stir up the wise INFJ child’s experience,
some so detrimental that they end up having
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Number 1: Relying on their empathy as a form
The INFJ child may be small, but their brain
power and empathetic understanding of their
surroundings often exceeds that of most adults.
While this comes with some amazing benefits,
starting them on their journey of deep perceptions
when it comes to reading their peers, it also
comes with its difficulties and harsh realities.
One of these many difficulties being that
adults may see them as the wise old soul they
are and subconsciously utilize it to their
An example of this would be a parent relying
on their INFJ child as a mental dumping ground
to their own traumas, struggles and life challenges.
your child in emotional lessons in life, some
parents can take it a little too far by resorting
to venting to their highly intelligent child
in hopes of some unbiased advice rooted in
Not only can this end up ruining the INFJ’s
appreciation for their gifts, but it can also
cause them to grow up faster than they already
It’s one thing for a parent to look up to
their INFJ child as a wise and emotionally
mature companion in hopes of some free therapy.
However, on the other side of the spectrum
independence and intelligence for what it
This parenting mistake comes in the form of
always thinking they know what’s best for
the INFJ child, despite noticeably expressed
When the imaginative and free-spirited INFJ
child is subjected to an unwavering demand
of blind obedience and conformity, it won’t
take long until they become merely a shell
Demonstrated through frustration, sadness
and rebellion, the potential brightness of
the INFJ child is dimmed year after year,
until they are able to successfully retaliate.
Whether in the form of fleeing the home at
an early age or pushing a divorce on the opposing
parent, the INFJ child will suffer from the
traumas that come from an overly domineering
Number 3: Being dismissive of the INFJ child’s
Speaking of the overbearing parent, one of
the many traits of this parenting mistake
is the inability for the child to participate
of approach, no form of rule-setting will
sit well with the innately nonconforming INFJ
type’s very nature to question everything
of being difficult, it’s only when the INFJ
child’s constant questioning is dismissed
and ignored that they begin to act out of
Of course, this parenting mistake can be damaging
for children of any personality type as they’re
challenged to learn the ins-and-outs of the
However, for the INFJ type, the failed reliance
on their parents to aid them along the mind-expanding
years of childhood can end up costing them
the trust they should have in later years.
Not only that, but the already independent
INFJ who is subjected to this type of childhood
can have an even more difficult time in trusting
others and accepting help through adulthood.
Number 4: Not accepting their introversion
With a mix of being attentive and imaginative,
most people with the INFJ personality type
will struggle with social endeavors right
With a natural preference to observe from
afar, the INFJ is rarely the class-clown,
the team-captain, or the head of any extracurricular
In fact, with a draw towards learning, nature,
reading and writing, the INFJ child can feel
apprehensive to start new friendships on their
Usually, it takes a more extroverted character
to slowly pull the INFJ child from their inner
However, for the parent who refuses to accept
this aspect of their introverted intuitive
child, pushing them to sign up for hobbies,
activities and even classes that may break
them out of this shell prematurely, it can
Whether it’s verbally encouraging them to
socialize at a family gathering, trying to
question why they are the way they are in
social settings, or actively pushing them
to mingle with other children, the INFJ child
will feel the lack of control they have over
their ambiversion, causing them to even fake
social relationships to make their parents
Number 5: Comparing them to other children
Speaking of refusing to accept their introversion,
there’s nothing that will make the already
confused INFJ child question their undeniable
differences more than being compared to other
do you need to question everything I ask you
to do, why can’t you be more like your sister?”
Simple remarks like this may be easily brushed
off by the average child, but for the INFJ
type who already notices how different they
feel from those around them, they can be detrimental
to their mental health and their willingness
In fact, most INFJ adults hold a subtle sense
of trauma from this exact parenting mistake,
making them feel inadequate by constantly
comparing themselves to others, ultimately
resulting in self-sabotaging behaviors in
The difference in self-awareness between an
INFJ child who was praised for their differences
in comparison to those who were belittled
for it is drastic and only becomes more noticeable
Number 6: Not supporting their odd interests
their quirky and unconventional hobbies and
With a steady mix of wanting to try new things
and becoming fixated on the things they enjoy,
the INFJ child requires flexible and non-judgmental
Since it can be difficult for this type to
fit in with those around them, these interests
and fascinations are what the INFJ relies
on when it comes to building their mental
repertoire and understandings of the world
Unfortunately, when a child of the INFJ type
is constantly redirected or doubted due to
a parent’s expectations, the act of picking
up new hobbies can come with an underlying
Plus, without passion and interest, most INFJs
have a difficult time applying themselves
fully to a hobby, sport or endeavor that is
Not only does this perspective follow them
to adulthood in varying forms, but it can
also ruin the INFJ’s self-esteem while adding
a whole new layer to their preexisting self-doubt.
Number 7: Writing their necessary recharge
Despite children of both introverted and extroverted
nature being more energetically charged than
the average adult, the child or adolescent
With feelings of overwhelm, burnout and fatigue
being all too common for the INFJ type, it’s
only slightly different from when they were
In fact, due to the fact that during childhood,
the development of the INFJ’s introverted
intuition and extroverted feeling is in full-swing,
solitude and processing time is at an all
The INFJ child requires ample amounts of alone
time in order to sort through the vast ideas,
understandings, and observations they face
However, when the parent of an INFJ sees their
or inattentiveness, they may begin to project
Especially for the more extroverted parent,
Without the understanding that this down time
is extremely important for their development,
it’s not uncommon for the parent of an INFJ
child to push them to fill their spare moments
with socializing, playing or any other type
And while it may not seem like a big deal
in the moment, it can cause the INFJ to become
avoidant of their required recharge and reflection
time, turning to more turbulent types of distraction
So, do you agree with these parenting mistakes?
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