The Infj'S (Seriously Strange) Dilemma With Eye Contact

The Infj'S (Seriously Strange) Dilemma With Eye Contact explores key ideas related to psychology, presented clearly and practically.

They say the INFJ gaze can pierce through

someone’s soul.. usually without the INFJ

Yet, when it comes to engaging in conversation

and focusing on the sentences they’re trying

to form through their whirl-wind of thoughts

and ideas, eye contact can be all too distracting

So, what’s the deal with the INFJ personality

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With deep, elaborate and distracting inner

psychological complexes, the INFJ not only

listens with keen interest, but their introverted

intuition also requires them to take a step

back and process the uptake of information

While this process allows them to give genuine

and empathetic advice, it also makes it difficult

for them to give quick replies of their preferred

This all becomes even more difficult when

they feel obligated to maintain adequate eye

So, when INFJs find themselves in a deep and

engaging conversation, they may intermittently

look away more often than normal, stare off

into the distance or even begin to fidget

as their minds are going a mile a minute.

In fact, it’s usually easier for the INFJ

to really immerse themselves when their eyes

Although they may look disengaged, this actually

that they feel comfortable enough to use their

Number 2: Sometimes they can get caught up

in trying to maintain proper social etiquette

Now, as much as the INFJ may subconsciously

avoid eye contact in certain scenarios, they

can definitely make it a priority when it’s

This is where the struggle of concentrated

and unnatural eye contact comes into play.

When it comes to job interviews, important

first impressions, and other social priorities

that require proper eye contact, INFJs will

make it a conscious point to look someone

Yet, because it’s so unnatural to them in

these scenarios due to their extroverted feeling

and sensing functions requiring the utmost

observation of new people and surroundings,

their efforts to remain engaged while maintaining

They may find themselves staring into the

of losing their train of thought, disregarding

what the other person is saying or the worst

Aside from their conscious attempts at maintaining

proper eye contact, the infamous INFJ stare

is unacknowledged to most INFJs until someone

And while this stereotypical stare is usually

subconscious, once INFJs understand their

piercing gaze can in fact be intimidating

and even creepy in some instances, they’re

able to take the precautionary measures to

However, this can put them in an even deeper

predicament of avoiding looking people in

the eyes in order to make the other person

Due to their own experiences and because of

this piercing gaze, they know that when they

lock eyes with someone who is immersed in

verbal expression, it can cause them to fumble.

And the last thing any INFJ wants is for another

person to feel uncomfortable sharing their

Number 4: If they’re intimidated or attracted

So, the INFJ personality type avoids eye contact

in order to concentrate on their inner processing,

and sometimes to avoid making others uncomfortable..

Yet, what about when the INFJ themselves feels

However, they can easily become a little less

confident when faced with someone they fancy

In fact, according to an INFJ reddit forum

based on how they interact with their crushes,

Not only is it difficult for them to maintain

eye contact in these scenarios, but it can

be challenging for them to simply think of

INFJs of both genders claim it’s much easier

for them to talk to people they’re not attracted

to or intimidated by in the slightest, and

because of that, paradoxically, they may seem

aloof, unfriendly and unapproachable to these

Number 5: They maintain the best eye contact

When it comes to social interactions, they

This is especially true when there’s something

staff lunch table, or the family gossip that

they really couldn’t care less about, contradictingly,

in the eyes of others, INFJs usually seem

most engaged when taking part in rather surface-level

Although they’re usually slightly disinterested

in the topic of conversation, it tends to

be slightly easier for them to act with social

This is especially true in a larger gathering

where they can follow the individual speakers

one at a time, without feeling obligated to

And while, depending on the topic of conversation,

they may in fact be ignoring what’s being

said, distracted by their own imaginative

ideas and thoughts, externally they’re usually

convincing others that they’re totally immersed.

Number 6: Discussing personal matters leaves

Although the INFJ is already reluctant to

sharing their personal details and internal

thought processes, even to those closest to

And when this private personality type does

find themselves in these occasional conversations,

they may find it more difficult to look someone

While this does have a little bit to do with

the fact that they’re internally processing

the appropriate words to explain their internal

feelings, their emotional attachment may also

Since the INFJ is known for being rather disconnected

to their own feelings, and more attached to

the feelings of others, when it comes to sharing

their own internal struggles, achievements,

and experiences, it can become an entirely

One that shuts off their obligation for social

etiquette, as well as their curiosity for

Number 7: They can get distracted by observing

Are they wanting to wrap up the conversation?”..

“Are they folding their arms because they’re

“Are they fidgeting and swaying due to their

With extroverted sensing at the root of how

the INFJ interacts with the world around them,

this observational type is always subconsciously

picking up on the subtlest of body language

In fact, whether they like it or not, most

INFJs have the habit of trying to figure out

the unspokenness of an individual, and whether

or not they’re enjoying the conversation.

The unfortunate aspect to this high-alert

habit is that they can actually end up distracting

themselves from just simply interacting with

Or even worse, make the other person feel

uncomfortable because they’re too busy looking

at every other part of their body but their

The oddest aspect of this observational gift

or curse, is that the INFJ can be blankly

looking someone in the eyes while they’re

actually fully focused within their peripheral

Number 8: Peripheral vision is much preferred

Speaking of peripheral vision, the INFJ’s

curious and observant nature actually causes

them to utilize this human ability more often

In fact, when it comes to passing strangers

on the street, within the workplace, at social

gatherings or even within small groups of

people, INFJs seem to rely on their entire

field of vision in order to observe passer-bys

They say eye contact shows power, confidence

and even dominance, and in reality, INFJs

usually want to remain as unnoticed and behind

And because of that, this type has become

quite experienced in observing others in the

In fact, this can be a key factor in the challenge

on one thing about a specific person, or one

So, can you relate to these odd eye-contact

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