Why First Impressions Mean Nothing To The Infj explores key ideas related to psychology, presented clearly and practically.
They say you never get a second chance at
And while initial meetings certainly do paint
a particular picture in most people’s minds,
to the INFJ, they’re not taken so seriously.
In fact, to most people with this accurate
room-reading personality type, first meetings
tell the INFJ nothing at all about what they
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Number 1: They understand first impressions
While the idea of first impressions can seem
like a neat and tidy idea of self-representation,
in the real world, they’re never as authentic
With such knowledge and the preference for
only taking the utmost truth of things into
their reality, INFJs understand this concept
Through their introverted intuitive lenses,
INFJs can see right through the surface level
of each individual person they come in contact
they present themselves, their body language,
their tone of voice or their behavior towards
others, this personality type can see the
misrepresentation of the front people put
Just as it’s not encouraged to judge a book
by its cover, first impressions in the eye’s
of an INFJ are nothing but the observation
of how well someone can play their facade.
And while it’s not always intentional, and
most times actually serves to be quite necessary,
first impressions don’t serve to have the
same importance to this analytical type as
Number 2: They can’t even be their normal
Speaking of the initial impression mask that
we all seem to wear, INFJs know that they
How can they take others seriously upon first
meeting when they are far from being who they
In fact, the INFJ type is not only one of
the most private personality types, but also
one of the only types that usually takes months
or even years to get to know who they are
Despite being considerably pleasant in either
regard, when first meeting others, INFJs automatically
absorb the mood and energy they receive from
their conversational opponent and mirror it
If there is an essence of excitement and charisma
radiating from another person, they automatically
tune into that energy to play a part that
This is the same subconscious approach they
take when trying to get on the level of someone
battling difficult emotions or challenging
And while of course, this is in fact a part
of the INFJ’s authentic personality, sometimes
this chameleon-like technique gets in the
way of showing what they’re truly thinking
Number 3: They know that anxiety plays a big
So, the big question is, what exactly causes
most people to rely on this masked version
While there’s a lot that goes into a first
meeting, especially for someone who considers
themselves to be introverted by nature, anxiety
and fear of judgment usually play a major
The INFJ not only knows this to be true for
themselves, but they also can easily decipher
natural confidence from artificial confidence
Of course, natural confidence seems to be
a reoccurring strength of those with more
However, despite how contagious and genuine
natural confidence is, it doesn’t fool the
INFJ into thinking any differently compared
INFJs don’t necessarily see shyness or self-containedness
to be a weakness as some other people would.
And similarly, someone’s outgoing and captivating
nature doesn’t impress them upon the initial
Number 4: They can’t form opinions without
Truth-seekers at heart, INFJs rarely take
While certain first impressions may just end
up being all the INFJ needs to form an accurate
Through the absence of deep conversation,
observations of how they treat other people,
INFJs will deem another person a stranger
Despite their ability to form an accurate
web of assumptions about another upon initial
interaction due to their introverted intuition
and extroverted sensing, INFJs need to see
people in their most vulnerable states in
order to interpret their own assumptions fully.
Not only does this approach give others a
chance to fully prove themselves before being
judged, but it also gives the INFJ a deeper
understanding of just how different first
impressions are to the true character of the
The challenge in this case is finding the
time and being open enough to allow people
the time of day to get past the initial acquaintance
Number 5: Initial impressions are automatically
With everyone’s realities and perspectives
being slightly off from one another, things
like first impressions can also serve to be
To the INFJ who inspects other’s thoughts
and opinions with a fine-toothed comb, they
understand that upon first meetings, two people
can walk away with completely different judgements
In fact, not only does this difference show
that people have different interpretations
of things like body language, slang, personality
and demeanor, but it also demonstrates that
impressions are mostly rooted in the observer’s
For the INFJ who often plays devil's advocate,
due to their empathetic and sensing abilities,
first impressions open up multiple angles
of perspective for them, often making it difficult
This is also the concept they remind themselves
of when going into situations where they feel
obliged to make a good first impression of
to change the lens through which others see
Number 6: First impressions are often calculated
On the topic of biased perspectives, first
impressions are easily swayed and manipulated
In fact, when meeting someone that a trusted
friend has previously interacted with, we
often get a little synopsis of who that individual
another that humans go into pre-conditioned
first impressions with an already painted
In fact, rooted in the INFJ’s disinterest
in gossip and rumors, most people with this
type believe that hearsay can alter one’s
entire perspective of another without even
This is what makes first impressions so loosely
Despite everyone perceiving other people through
different lenses, a trusted opinion can go
a long way when it comes to judging people
And despite knowing this to be true, the INFJ
can easily fall victim to this type of subconscious
and unintentional manipulation of thoughts,
making it even more difficult to trust their
own interpretations of someone’s character.
Number 7: Lack of time adds unnecessary pressure
When there’s a set-up first impression with
limited timing, the pressure to prove yourself
For the INFJ type, not only do these types
of high-pressure meet-ups cause serious pre-attendance
rumination, but they also add an additional
layer of difficulty due to feeling obligated
to share so much about themselves in such
For most people, preparing for a professional
interview or first date involves mentally
sorting through their own personal traits
and deciphering which ones are worth mentioning
All while trying to take mental note of the
things the other person is sharing about themselves.
Sure, we can get either a positive or negative
But, time restraints limit our ability to
get to know someone beyond a superficial level.
Number 8: They can see the toxicity behind
INFJs not only accurately observe others,
but they also appreciate the difference they
see in how different humans present themselves.
With different expressions, gestures and habits,
everyone carries themselves with a unique
twist..so unique that others often fail to
Without the ability to relate to another on
some level, humans are naturally quick to
judge, ultimately leading to contributing
to the everyday prejudice and discrimination
INFJs see first hand what snap judgements
can do to humanity as a whole, and with that
understanding, most people with this empathetic
personality type refuse to be overthrown by
Regardless of their own necessity to see others
for who they are at their core, INFJs can
also see just how destructive it can be to
So, how seriously do you take first impressions
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